The Revenge of Winter

Here is something that has plagued me for a while;




Next to that dormer is a chimney that I have to add about 10 feet to. The box gutter is shot and that piece of plywood is to support my weight when I have to stand on that ledge to tar the roof in that area every year until I replace the slate. The water that runs off gets sucked up by the brick and is the reason why my bathroom wall is damp and peeling and also the cause of that ceiling mushroom that I showed you several months back. Well, this has caused another problem now. Below this area is a stairway to the basement that isn't covered with a cellar storm door. The doorway is boarded up and the side walls have bulged for years due to the heaving of the ground due to freezing and thawing in the winter. Not any more though. Today they looked like this;



Now isn't that special?

New House Accessories

This weeks auction netted us a few things. Besides an Eastlake wood top parlor table for $45 and two oak school type chairs for $15 we got these Griswold cast iron mail boxes for $40.



When I get bored I can whack these with a wire brush and spray paint them black so they can look as good as new. I haven't figured out what to do with the second one yet. Maybe I'll save it until Elizabeth is a teenager. I can attach it to her bedroom door to put her mail in after I ground her for a year when she has a hissy fit at Meijers and gets the police called on me.... wait, she has already done that!

Damn Spammers!

Even though you might use word verification to prevent spambots from zapping your blog it won't stop spammers! When this site gets spammed, I just delete the post. Lately some of my earlier posts got spammed in the comments. Upon a little research I am finding that the spammers are searching Google for blogs with specific key words. In all cases the searches were for words related to the subject the spammer was promoting and in my case the words searched were sexually oriented. Once again "Farmhouse Sex" was one of the searches and another had to do with spanking! The common thread that links the spammers is more interesting. They are located in India. I guess this is the penalty I pay for calling my site "This Old Crack House" and having a potty mouth. On the other hand, some poor bastard is sitting at a computer during a monsoon season searching aimlessly for something pathetic in a language they don't fully comprehend. Think how sad it would be if someone in India who loves cats searched the internet using the key word "Pussy".....

Oh Crap! That's going to send my google hits through the roof.

Guess What?

I did something today that I haven't done in 10 weeks. Since the inside temperature was up to 54 degrees I actually worked on the house! I just started right where I left off before the temperatures dropped below freezing inside the building. That's right. I assumed the position of being on my knees on the floor, bent over a heat gun with a paint scraper in my hand while sluggishly plodding away at the timeless task of stripping paint and goo off a floor. I had truely forgotten just how much I missed it! Some things I'm afraid, are best forgotten.

Springeth Hath Sprungeth

Spring officially began at 8:07 PM last night. So in good Olde English tradition lets all sing a round! Repeat after me...

Svmer is icumen in,
Lhude sing cuccu!

Groweþ sed and bloweþ med
And springþ þe wde nu,
Sing cuccu!

Awe bleteþ after lomb,
Lhouþ after calue cu.
Bulluc sterteþ, bucke uerteþ,
Murie sing cuccu!

Cuccu, cuccu, wel singes þu, cuccu;
Ne swik þu nauer nu.

Pes:
Sing cuccu nu. Sing cuccu.
Sing cuccu. Sing cuccu nu!

What? You didn't understand a word of that? Hmmm well I guess the English language has changed somewhat since 1260 AD.

Here is a Modern English translation but it doesn't fit well with the melody.

Summer has arrived,
Loudly sing, Cuckoo!

Seeds grow and meadows bloom
And the forest springs anew,
Sing, Cuckoo!

The ewe bleats after the lamb,
The cow lows after the calf.
The bullock jumps, the billy-goat farts,
Merrily sing, Cuckoo!

Cuckoo, cuckoo, well you sing, cuckoo;
Nor cease you ever now,

Sing cuckoo now. Sing, Cuckoo.
Sing Cuckoo. Sing cuckoo now!


There is a sound clip of the first version if this sounds familiar.

So what have you learned today? I am completely off my rocker (cuckoo, cuckoo) and goats have been farting since the Middle Ages!

My Life as Barbie and Lawn Thatching

Once in a while I actually get to sit down and watch This Old House Hour on PBS. Several months ago I saw an episode of Ask This Old House that involved lawn care. Roger pulled out a tool that is used for "thatching" a lawn. When I saw the tool I said "Hey, I've got one of those! It's been hanging in the garage for years!"

This week, between dealing with day to day life and playing "Barbies" with Elizabeth (which is kind of fun because my character looks like Barbie but sounds like Ken...) I have spent a few moments thatching the lawn and getting blisters. Fortunately the lawn at the resident home is smallish due to flower beds that look like crap as you can see;

"Oh, and here is the kewl tool. It kinda sorta looks like a rake, only different" (he says, looking like Barbie but sounding like Ken);



Maybe I should start "Ask This Old Crack House?" On second thought, maybe I shouldn't.

Anyway, did you know there is a new "Divorced Barbie" set? Yeah, it comes with all Kens stuff!

I Don't Know?

Oh no! It looks like Woods is having another auction next week! Things can get crazy around here the week before a Woods Auction. Just look at how excited Elizabeth gets. She can't wait to get there!

Feeling All Warm and Fuzzy Inside!!!!!

Tonight was our 2nd annual neighborhood chili cook-off event. This year we had 14 different entries instead of the 4 last year. We had double the attendance too. If you want to be amused you can read about last years event. With the greater variety of choices this year and two beers when I got home, I am certain that by noon tomorrow I WILL KNOW the difference between my a** and a hole in the ground......

Does anyone know how to fix burned porcelain?

Happy Birthday to Us!

Elizabeth turned 4 today.

I expect that I will be receiving another one of those cards sometime this week from Lowes that says "Happy Birthday" followed by "If you spend $XXX you will save $X like I did last year about this time.

AND this Blog is officially two years old today! I don't know whether to boast or complain......

A Direct Reply from Rejuvenation!

Before I posted my Indirect Reply post I sent a copy to Jim Kelly (the Owner) at Rejuvenation so they wouldn't get any more surprises from me. He responded with nice note indicating that he had tried to post a comment but experienced some difficulties with posting. He approved of my post and added that he was going to post a direct response on HIS BLOG.
I got an email a short while ago indicating that he has done this so you can all go over to HIS BLOG and see what he has to say! If you are interested in what he had to say about my marketing idea here it is:

"I will forward your marketing ideas to Tony Penca, our marketing director. I am not really up to speed with what all we are doing, but we are always willing to look at new ideas"

So, while you are at HIS BLOG site stop over and look at some of their light fixtures, put a wish list together and then let him know if you would support this kind of idea. If enough of us do it, it could happen! Let him know that Gary sent you.

There may be more to this houseblogging thing than meets the eye! Now if it would just get a little warmer so I could work on the house.....